We are sinking so fast

Sleep can often be a gift; perhaps it is the greatest escape. When the mind can shut itself off for a few hours and just be. Most nights my resting mind is a blank slate making quiet whirring noises dreaming of nothing but a black blackness. Occasionally, my dreams betray me letting shapes and colors slip past that sleepy membrane thus disturbing what would have been a peaceful nights sleep. In the night he managed to sneak through the cracks of my subconscious and bathe in my mind’s eye. He has stained my sleep and left me with this feeling that he is following me, standing just outside of my periphery. Despite it’s blank state of sleep, I think that my mind always misses him but often chooses not to acknowledge it. My mind is protecting my heart allowing my body to get up everyday and not plunge back into bed unable to stand up. But when you suddenly miss someone who’s been gone for a while it’s like they bump into you. As if you were two passing strangers walking the same path unaware of it until you collide and slam right into each other. You hit head on and all at once you realize how your life had formed around them and you wonder how you hadn’t noticed the gaping hole they’d left when they went.

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